Total Honesty Prepares Children for The Worst Possible Scenarios

My kids say that sometimes, when offering guidance, I am overly dramatic, because I often relate my advice to the worst possible scenarios. This is because I believe that if a person at least considers the worst possible outcome to their situation, then they will be prepared for anything that happens with that situation. It is like what Clausewitz wrote in his book on war. Clausewitz wrote that we should not prepare only for what we think that an opponent might do, but we should prepare for all that we know an opponent is capable of, and this is what I have tried to teach my children about life. Heightened preparedness creates a competitive advantage.

One thing that I discuss in this vein with my children is the matter of honesty. When they were younger, I told them that they should always be honest with their parents. The reason that I gave for this was because there might be an instance where they are faced with expulsion from school or prison time because they are accused of a heinous act. As a parent, I always wanted to be able to stand behind my children and believe their version of the story.

My instruction to my children was to always be honest with their parents. That way, without question, if the children said that they were innocent, then we could stand behind our children with impunity. When asked by my children why it had to be expulsion or prison, I would reply that it was because these were the worse cases, and as I mentioned, they would be prepared for anything less than this.

Parents will always defend their children against outside forces, but many times, though the parents stand behind the kids no matter what, when the forces provide evidence that the children are not being truthful, the parents are made to look foolish for not knowing the child as well as they thought. However, an unflinching policy of honesty between child and parent and vice versa creates unyielding support from the parents and prepares the children to be able to face down the worst possible scenarios with the knowledge that they have built-in support from their parents.