Behaving Like a Racist Makes You a Racist

Funny thing…if a white person says something derogatory about a person of color or performs an action to the detriment of a person of color, that white person will be considered a racist or a bigot. However, if a person of color says something derogatory about a white person, whether in comedy or as an act of defiance, that person of color will be considered to be acting out in response to many years of oppression and racial mistreatment. The sad reality is that racism is racism, whether as an action or as a reaction. 

Racism is defined as the belief that all members of each race possess characteristics or abilities specific to that race, especially so as to distinguish it as inferior or superior to another race or races. One of the things that I have taught my children is that if they want to be respected, then they have to show respect. While it is true that there will be instances where decisions will be made based on race, religion, gender or some other classification, more often than not, people will get out of life whatever they put into it. If a person behaves in a racist manner, they will be considered a racist, even if they are simply, in their minds, reacting to racism that they themselves had to endure.    

This piece is not designed to do anything more than say that racism is wrong, while some will see this as anti-black, anti-white, anti-comedy or anti-something else that can create controversy and conversation. The truth is that as a black man, I have been mistreated racially by white people, but I always looked at those instanced as exceptions as opposed to as the standards. The bible tells us that God wants us to treat others the way that we would want to be treated and that we should leave acts of revenge to God, and this is what I teach my children. Behaving is a racist manner in response to being racially mistreated makes us no better than those who we claim to have oppressed us. 

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If You Don't Know...Ask

Whenever we as parents talk to our children about peer pressure, we talk about things like drugs, sex and crime, but perhaps the worst peer pressure comes in school with the fear of being labeled “stupid” or a dummy for asking a question in class. When the teacher is going over a lesson in class, more often than not, children will have questions, and quite often, several children will have the same question, but these children will elect not to ask their question because they do not want the other kids to make fun of them for not being smart enough to understand the lesson.

One of the things that I have told my children is that through the course of their education, they have to be the person who makes sure that they finish school with whatever education they need in order to benefit the rest of their lives. I tell them that the only way that this is going to happen is if they take ownership of their education, and do whatever it takes to make sure that they learn everything that they can, and generally, this means asking questions when they don’t understand something. I tell them that the other kids probably have the same questions, but they are just as afraid to ask them because they do not want to get teased either.

I understand that being teased in school is harsh, but I try to get my children to understand the endgame of school, which is success in life. Education is the key to being able to do whatever they want to in life, and to making whatever money they want to make. I tell them that the only way that this can happen is if they look beyond some name calling and look towards their future, when they will appreciate the knowledge that they would have gained through school, in particular, the extra that would have come from asking the question that the other children were afraid to ask.